Fear
By sovknight | May 21, 2008
Recently, on a walk in Provo canyon with a friend, we came upon a snake writhing its way across the sidewalk to the cool grass alongside. My friend isn’t too fond of snakes, and the event was inaugurated by a shriek and capped by a conversation on what we’re afraid of.
I got to thinking about this. Seems most people are afraid of snakes or spiders or some creepy crawly thing. Others are afraid of bees or wasps or mice. Still others are afraid of less tangible things. More ideals or phobias, like heights or closed-in spaces.
I can’t say I’m afraid of any of those things. I think snakes are pretty cool, and spiders even cooler. Now, I’m not fond of being bitten or poisoned by one, but that’s not a reason to fear them in my opinion.
Here’s a fantastic picture of a friend of mine with a cool snake. I got to hold this snake too, and it was sweet. I looked and looked and didn’t find a picture of me with it, but my friend is much prettier than I am anyway, so this was a better representation. This particular snake was very friendly and well-behaved. He was also quite strong and agile. Snakes are creatures to be respected, for sure. But not feared.
Heights don’t bother me. Bees and wasps I just ignore for the most part. Closed-in spaces, large open spaces, birds, mice, cats, bugs… no real concern.
I’m not particularly fond of some things. Kids annoy me, but I don’t fear them. Ideas, like drowning or falling off a cliff are not very appealing, but I can’t say I’m afraid of them.
My friend asked, "What about death?"
Again, nope. I admit I’ve never been dead, so my frame of reference is minimal. I’ve been in situations before where death was a real possibility, but there’s a certain awareness or clarity of thought or lucidity that happens in such times, and I don’t know that fear enters the mind until upon reflection afterward.
A quick, violent death — like being shot perhaps, doesn’t give you much time to fear. The anticipation could be very fearful though, like if someone was coming after you to kill you, and I fully understand that. I suppose I would be quite scared in that situation.
A slow, painful death is more fearful to me. But I think people in those situations come to a certain acceptance about it, and fear probably isn’t an issue.
After lots of thought, I decided what I’m afraid of though. Yes — I have made up my mind.
I don’t want to leave without being remembered. I want a legacy of some kind, and I want people to know who I am. To me, the greatest thing in the world to fear is fading away without a trace. To have never been recognized or noticed.
That’s what I’m afraid of. What about you?
Topics: Thoughts |
6 Responses to “Fear”
Comments
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May 21st, 2008 at 8:46 pm
I would like to think that I’m not afraid of anything, but I am a terrible arachnophobe, and I’m not fond of snakes - they startle me. I’m not afraid of bees, but when they are aggressive, they start to get my heart pumping and I admit to being scared. Most of all, I’m afraid of not being liked, I think. That’s probably the source of my social issues. I wish it didn’t matter to me, but it does. And yeah, I don’t want to die. So I’m a freaking scaredy cat.
May 22nd, 2008 at 7:36 pm
I have a pretty bad fear of spiders, though it was much worse when I was growing up. I used to have a CRIPPLING fear of water. I’d have so many nightmares about drowning. It was actually a traumatic event in a canoe that cured me of the water fear. That, and being forced to learn to swim well.
Cancer scares me. Or some kind of lurking illness that I won’t be able to keep from killing me in a painful way.
I used to be scared of a lot more things, including dolls, demons, and darkness, but those pretty much disappeared after I became an atheist, and was able to move past my emotional baggage.
I too fear being forgotten, though I used to fear it much more.
There’s a lot of fear involved with my writing. I’m continually afraid I’ll stop being able to write, will run out of ideas, will never advance, be published, etc.
Anywho, there’s my long response.
May 23rd, 2008 at 7:01 am
Let’s see….
I used to be afraid of sharks and alligators. I had nightmares pretty much every night when I was young.
Those fears have vanished now that I’m brave enough to look under the bed.
Just yesterday I screamed, “Ahhh! Jim hurry..come here quick!” I was in a panic! (A spider)
I felt bad later because he RAN full speed upstairs (thinking I was hurt).
Animals(some stuffed) and snakes aside; I fear losing the people I love.
Life goes so fast…sometimes I wonder if I appreciate it enough. I try not to take things for granted but I tend to get comfortable.
When I see all the suffering and horrible things that happen in the world (just watch the depressing nightly news once!) I wonder why them? Why not me? Sometimes it’s like I’m waiting for the bottom to fall out.
May 25th, 2008 at 2:30 pm
I’m one of those with a fear of snakes … which leads me to ask (although I DO really want to know), how can you tell that the snake in the picture was “friendly” … as opposed to, say, hungry?!! I mean, dogs will wag their tails, cats will rub up against you, but what about snakes? (By the way, I’m also terrified of bats, so I’m not sweet on all mammals as opposed to reptiles.)
May 26th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Honestly, my fears do not involve me alone. All my fears or concerns involve my husband, my children…my family. I don’t fear death at all, but I do worry what would happen if…I were to die and leave my children to be raised by someone else or I guess if my children or husband were to have an untimely death (meaning anytime before they are REALLY old and grey); however, it doesn’t rule my life. You never know, so you always have to be prepared, it is something I think about!
May 29th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
OK, top five:
1) The idiots outbreeding the intellectuals. I wish it was an unfounded fear, but its consequences are real, they are terrifying, and they are in front of me at Kroger every time I want to buy something small, staggering along under the weight of Nascar-themed snack foods and their own wall-eyed, buck-toothed young.
2) My sisters succeeding in their mad plan to remove all traces of Hispanic culture or pride from subsequent generations of Jacksons. I didn’t know eugenics could be so personal or so pasty.
3) Costumed characters. Of any kind. That’s just wrong.
4) The ascendancy of fear-mongering, liberty-crushing, knee-jerk reactionism over intelligent discourse and progressiveness.
5) Living a life based on expectation and acquisitiveness rather than generosity and love.
Oh, and slugs. I’ll walk a mile to avoid those slimy bastards. It’s my theory they’re just waiting for us all to let down our collective guard, and then they’ll rise up on their previously-concealed cheetah feet, run us down, and messily devour us. Blerg.