There’s really no good reason for this.  Not one that I can think of, at least.  I did go to college, and in fact I got accepted into every college I applied to when I was 17.  Now, that was based largely on the fact that I played Viola, and less on my academics, but still, I graduated high school with a GPA around 3, which was respectable since I failed two math courses.  If not for that, I’d have made Cum Laude (I did the math.)  For the record, math still sucks and I hate it with a passion.

No, I didn’t finish for a couple of reasons.  Money was number one.  I funded my college education myself.  I didn’t get a single loan or grant, nor did my parents help in any way.  I got a job and went to college at the same time.  After a time, I simply ran out of money.  The bright side to that is that I have no loans to pay back.  I remain debt-free.

Two, I was young and impulsive.  There were too many distractions, like girls and work and girls and drinking beer with friends, going out (sometimes with girls), and generally being a kid, even though I was technically an adult.  I spent too much time in class goofing off.  I carried my “never do homework” policy over from high school, and I just pretty much dropped the ball.  I didn’t take it seriously enough.

Now that I’m old I realize what a huge mistake this was.  I’ve always said, and still maintain, that if there’s one regret I have in life, and if I could go back and redo one thing, I’d finish college.  Education is more important than just about everything else, and if you don’t take advantage of it, you find yourself in your late 30′s with no job and no degree trying to earn respect you apparently don’t deserve.  It’s very humbling.

I recently updated my resume.  I pretty much cried through the whole process, and I felt humiliated by the pathetic-ness of my professional life spelled out before me in black & white.  My resume is a sad, sad thing to see.  It lists years and years of actual work experience, almost all in leadership and management positions, but no real education, which probably invalidates the entire thing to hiring managers and HR people.  It’s embarrassing.

What makes is worse is that I see college-educated people all around me every day.  I see these people, with their fancy degrees and their six-figure salaries, and note that they lack even the most basic skills, like spelling words correctly and using proper grammar when they write.  They can’t articulate at all.  They are sloppy and lazy and over-confident.  I see examples of artwork by “professionals” that I know I can outdo easily.  These are people that paid tens of thousands of dollars for an education that can barely write their own names legibly, or create something truly unique that isn’t tainted by an over-reliance on forms and traditions.  It sickens me that my experience and native ability trumps their education almost every time, but if it came down to me and some guy with a degree for a job, guess who likely wins?

I’m woefully undereducated, but still pretty damn smart.  My close friends can attest to that.  There is nothing I’ve not excelled at when I take interest in it and put my mind to it.  I wish society could look at people for what they can do, and what they are, instead of what they didn’t do, and what they didn’t finish in the past.

I didn’t finish college.  Some mistakes you just can’t fix.

After I replied and offered to send her a higher-resolution shot, she contacted me again with payment details and the like.  I gotta say, I could get used to selling pictures.  Now I understand how some photographers make a good living doing this, and I’m really giving consideration to exploring it further.  I’m a little diminished by equipment at the moment, but you know, lenses can be rented.  Where I live has absolutely no shortage of photogenic stuff, and although it’s all been shot bazillions of times I’m sure, it hasn’t been shot by me.  I don’t mean to say I’m a spectacular photographer, only to say that my perspective is (of course) different than other people.  I’m willing to give it a shot at any rate.

So the ironic part, if you’ll indulge me for a second, is really quite amusing.  Last year, I spent a goodly amount of money on a very beautiful piece of equipment, a Canon EOS 40D SLR camera.  This is a very highly regarded camera, and I was fortunate to find one right when they were first released.  A nice DSLR is something I’ve always wanted, and I was finally able to justify to myself the expense by realizing that where I live, I could really get some use out of it.  Not only that, but I’m a control freak, and I like having the utmost control over aspect of my image.  Buying a new DSLR was a no-brainer.

So the irony… The day I went with some friends up to the Spiral Jetty, I didn’t take my uber-expensive new DSLR.  I’m not sure why exactly, only I remember expecting a full car and not much room, and I perhaps thought a bulky camera wouldn’t be prudent.  Instead, I had my trusty Sony DSC W-1 point&shoot with me.  This is my back-up camera; a little 5.1 megapixel dealie that fits right in my pocket.  An even sadder bit of irony is that I forgot to charge the batteries the night before, so I think I only got a few shots that day.  The good news is, one of those shots will make me a published photographer.

I just find it ironic that I spent roughly sixteen hundred dollars on a camera, only to have my little $400 camera usurp it.  Now I wish I had my nice camera with me that day, only because I look at the picture now and think of how much sharper and clearer it could be.  Still, I think the picture looks pretty good, and if the Creative Director of a major publication likes it, who am I to judge?